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(More customer reviews)In her newest book, Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too, Shellie Rushing Tomlinson has done it again! Her very funny instruction manual bares all!
FINALLY someone has revealed all the well-kept secrets of the Southern Mama Society (SMS). We men in the South have grown up fully convinced that there were some things going on around us that molded our existences without our knowledge. We also got the feeling that we were cooperators unawares. It seemed our behavior was somehow being manipulated by unknown forces beyond our control.
IT'S ALL TRUE! . . . and its far more developed, widespread, and networked than we could EVER have imagined. Who would have known . . . but only among the Southern boys and men, of course! Our women have known these things for generations!
Here is where Shellie really lets the cat out of the bag, "...I wasn't very old before I realized that Mama and her girlfriends were good at getting their husbands to do what they wanted, all the while letting the men think it was their own idea. Some people would call this manipulation. Southern women call it charm."
"Charm" does make manipulation SOUND better. All this time I thought charm was good when it was really SMS code for "get your way."
As Shellie says, "...our mamas believe in putting a shoulder to your dreams and feet to your prayers. If you want it, go after it. Things may not always work out the way you hope, but let it never be because you didn't try. Forgive me if that doesn't fit with your stereotypical idea of the fragile southern belle who spends her days resting on the couch and fanning herself between fainting spells, but I don't know that mythical breed. The southern female of my experience is more likely to gear up for battle than retreat to the sofa."
That's been my experience, as I'm sure most Southern men will agree.
Are we Southern men ever fortunate to have all these well-hidden secrets of the SMS revealed! It will revolutionize the way we view ourselves and those women around us. Now we know the shorthand and signals of the SMS. Knowledge is power!
MEN, be VERY CAREFUL how you use this knowledge. If you get a little heavy handed, you might have to go for burgers . . . or possibly worse. The members of the SMS can get even in ways most of us have not even imagined until Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On! I suspect there are at least as many that Shellie Tomlinson has not yet revealed. I'll hide in the weeds (a Southern man saying) waiting for Book 2 on the subject.
DO NOT overlook the absolutely delicious recipes Shellie includes. Check this out: Pork Roast Barbecue Recipe--This is killin' goood! It'll make you want slap yore mama . . . as we say in the South. But as Shellie points out, it's only a fool who would think of tryin'!
And the recipes for all those dips and sauces! I can't wait to try them. They suggest many of the absolutely scrumptious flavors I've learned to love in Southern cooking.
MEN, get your copy quick! This stuff is too good to miss! Don't just read it: MEMORIZE IT!
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The host of All Things Southern shares the sass and strength of Southern mamas in this spunky guide to life. In this humorous handbook, Shellie Rushing Tomlinson, host of All Things Southern, reveals the all-important lessons Southern Mamas teach their daughters. Readers will discover why blue eye shadow is trashy and learn to interpret regional dialect like the Southern Mama APB, a bulletin translated on Southern streets as: "Give your heart to Jesus, girl, because your butt is all mine!" Shellie carefully breaks down the teachings behind those famous manners and social graces through her firsthand observations and dry wit. Here's everything you need to know from how to cope with the unexpected, compete in the Mr. Right Game Show, and raise children—to how to keep that marriage knot tied tight over time. Woven with quotes from real Southern Mamas and sprinkled with recipes and other Southern secrets, this book's a bona-fide celebration of all things south of the Mason-Dixon Line.
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